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- Best lesbian dating sites (and why they work): HER, OkCupid, and more
- 7 of the best dating sites for lesbians (and why they are actually good)
Side note: We totally encourage you to read Sheets' whole story. Why it works: Aside from the obvious reason that it's one of the only dating apps specifically for lesbians and queer women without being some gross sexualized thing? Requiring Facebook to register solves one of the main issues that comes along with online dating as a lesbian: Desperate men posing as women, attempting to do Eliminating fake and scammer profiles that often pop up on hookup apps gives a heightened sense of security, and makes HER much more inviting to women who may have shied away before.
Even if you're not looking for a relationship, HER is just a great place to make friends in your area if you are at capacity with straight friends. Another refreshing aspect is that HER is so much more than a hookup app, and doesn't even put on the pressure to find a romantic partner.
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The bad news: We have seen a few women mention that HER's reputation for being a "relationship app" has gotten so overbearing that it feels like your feed is just full of women complaining about being single. But this is probably dependent on your location, and we think that the good totally outweighs the bad here. The cost: HER is free to download and there are no in-app purchases.
Image: fem. Fem Fem stands out by encouraging users to submit video, so you're better protected from catfishing. The gist: Being catfished is one of the most common horror stories across all online dating platforms, but is especially an issue for lesbians with creepy men lurking and trying to pass as women. No thanks. While requiring a Facebook approval is one way to combat the straight men, another way is to require a video instead of pictures, which is the unique route that Fem takes.
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The setup: Fem encourages users to introduce themselves with video profiles as way to be personal right off the bat and you'll get to hear their voice before meeting IRL, which is a nice touch. Some of us are too shy for videos raises hand , so Fem doesn't require it, and you can just post your best selfies instead. As of now, it's pretty foolproof. Aside from the video aspect, Fem has most of the average features that you'd expect on any dating app and operates about the same, so there's no weird learning curve.
Why it works: The videos. Fem also has a unique tool called "Rooms" where users can chat in a variety of different groups, send selfies, or talk about some deep shit. Being a lesbian can be lonely, especially if you're not out yet or are having a time making non-straight friends, and Fem gives an awesome opportunity to expand your circle and meet women with similar experiences. The bummers: Because it's relatively new and has experienced some technical difficulties, Fem has a small user database and doesn't show people based on location, so women you meet might not be from your area.
The cost: Fem is free to download and there are no in-app purchases. Image: OKcupid. OkCupid With its matching technology and large dating pool, OkCupid is great for queer women. The gist: Our favorite of the non lesbian-specific options, OkCupid has truly upped its queer game in the last few years. As one of the biggest dating apps in America with extensive user profiles, OKCupid gives you a large dating pool and offers opportunities to find a lasting connection.
The setup: Similar to traditional players like eharmony or Match , OKCupid has in-depth user bios and sets of questions, making the setup process slower than its counterparts. What's great about this though is that you can be more sure that you're connecting over more than just thinking the other person is hot. It does use swiping like Tinder , but you have a lot more to go off of than just their picture and a quote from The Office as a bio.
OkCupid is a more serious space, and most users are genuinely using their bios to attract lasting connections.
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One thing that makes OkCupid more relationship-y is that matches are shown based on the percentage of things you had in common in the questions you answered — aka it doesn't just show you every random person in your vicinity who happens to have the same page liked on Facebook. It's not perfect, but it'll help meeting in person go a lot smoother.
Why it works: As their slogan says, "Dating deserves better.
OkCupid started out focusing solely on straight people, but has experienced an awesome queer-friendly revamp in the past years, with an expansion to 12 sexual orientations and 20 gender identities in Those who steered clear of online dating in the past due to a lack of inclusive language can now be themselves and find kindred souls without conforming to labels. OkCupid has also been around forever, and since it's a trusted name means that it has a robust lesbian following. The massive pool may be overwhelming, but it's ideal if you who want lots of options but would rather die than use Tinder.
The cost: OkCupid is free to register and download, and the most basic features that you'll need messaging, matching, etc. Image: Plenty of fish.
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Plenty of Fish Plenty of Fish has a large user base and its questionnaires help you find someone you'll have chemistry with, but it's not bisexual-friendly. The gist: One of the first dating websites to launch ever , Plenty of Fish is one of those sites that everyone has heard of and is likely the first place people go to if they're not into the Tinders of the world.
While the registration process requires some pretty heavy duty question answering, it's only because POF wants to help you find actual chemistry. They're a trusted name for a reason. POF's advertising isn't as aimed toward the younger crowd as OkCupid's "Hey, we're gay" billboards are, so POF's audience is slightly skewed with a more mature audience. The setup: Plenty of Fish is one of the older sites out there, and its aesthetic honestly looks like it hasn't been updated since The website isn't very intuitive or nice to look at, but we'll ignore that the iOS and Android apps are much better looking than the desktop version.
The matchmaking process is super in-depth: Aside from the usual questions about age, height, body type, etc. Of course, you'll also write a bio and add pictures as well. Our point? They really want to get to know you. Why it works: Launched in just a year before OkCupid , Plenty of Fish has been an extremely strong player in the online dating game and has one of the highest number of daily users over 3.
Chemistry is the name of the game here, and the multiple questionnaires are no joke. This isn't a quick five-second set up like other apps, as POF truly wants you to dig deep so that they can give you the best quality matches. Not only does POF attempt to match you with people who you'll statistically get along with based on answers to questions, it also wants to match you with people who are looking for the same thing as you.
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7 of the best dating sites for lesbians (and why they are actually good)
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